Dear Vice President Bush,
Greetings from the trailer park! I'm writing this here letter as a big howdy do to yall and yours during g*y pride month. (Wanted to censor that there as not to expose the lil lady to a heart flutter.) Actually, I've been wanting to write you a letter for a very long time and with you claiming to be from Texas and all, maybe one day you might just stop by the park.
I have a few open complaints that I wish to air and kindly pardon me if I seem frank.
(Get it Dubby, pardon? heh..)
1) Health care sucks in this country and ain't a damn thing happenin. Now I do understand money being tight Dubby, truly I do. Ciggarettes went up another $1 a pack here and that's stretching me, myself. You're a big spender there with Iraq and I get that. But surely you can find a few dimes in the Oval Office couches to work something out. I hear that President Chaney has mighty deep pockets and two Mr. Potato Heads are better than one!
2) Iraq. Sure you're more qualified to run this thing than I am (cough), but what the hell are we doing? One of our favorite sayins here at the park is "shit or get off the pot". Granted the USA is in A LOT of shit, but I think the phrase goes more along the lines of taking action in a forward direction. Am I military? No. Do I have any war or command experience? No. Have I ever volunteered to die for my country? No. But I watch the news and see the names as they roll on the screen. I watch families on Frontline as worlds are shattered. And contrary to what you may think, the American people are still your boss. Don't be writing checks that your body can't cash.
'Bring them home Dubby. Not in the name of defeat or hastily in two day's time.
Just bring them home soon. It's seriously not working out.
- Now just let me clarify here. See, I can be pissed at you while being forever in debt to our troops. Every drop of blood that YOU spill is done so that I may sleep in freedom each night.
THANK YOU to our troops for your dedication, commitment and sacrifices.
3) What the holy happola is happening to gas prices? I reckon that you're not concerned being that you roll around in that super tank of a caddy. It must be nice to jump in the car for a drive anytime in DC or Crawford and not have to scrounge for a few gallons of gas.
I know you're a busy guy and all flying everywhere with all that gas money but please feel free to give us a ringy-dingy anytime here at the park. Our fondest howdy do's to the little lady and offspring. Oh, and congrats on the new Chaney bundle of joy. I for one have thoroughly enjoyed seeing that Republican nightmare swept under the rug. Go team!
Happy GAY PRIDE month to you and yours!
(Un)Sincerely,
Two Pink Flamingos and a Trailer Park.
Greetings from the trailer park! I'm writing this here letter as a big howdy do to yall and yours during g*y pride month. (Wanted to censor that there as not to expose the lil lady to a heart flutter.) Actually, I've been wanting to write you a letter for a very long time and with you claiming to be from Texas and all, maybe one day you might just stop by the park.
I have a few open complaints that I wish to air and kindly pardon me if I seem frank.
(Get it Dubby, pardon? heh..)
1) Health care sucks in this country and ain't a damn thing happenin. Now I do understand money being tight Dubby, truly I do. Ciggarettes went up another $1 a pack here and that's stretching me, myself. You're a big spender there with Iraq and I get that. But surely you can find a few dimes in the Oval Office couches to work something out. I hear that President Chaney has mighty deep pockets and two Mr. Potato Heads are better than one!
2) Iraq. Sure you're more qualified to run this thing than I am (cough), but what the hell are we doing? One of our favorite sayins here at the park is "shit or get off the pot". Granted the USA is in A LOT of shit, but I think the phrase goes more along the lines of taking action in a forward direction. Am I military? No. Do I have any war or command experience? No. Have I ever volunteered to die for my country? No. But I watch the news and see the names as they roll on the screen. I watch families on Frontline as worlds are shattered. And contrary to what you may think, the American people are still your boss. Don't be writing checks that your body can't cash.
'Bring them home Dubby. Not in the name of defeat or hastily in two day's time.
Just bring them home soon. It's seriously not working out.
- Now just let me clarify here. See, I can be pissed at you while being forever in debt to our troops. Every drop of blood that YOU spill is done so that I may sleep in freedom each night.
THANK YOU to our troops for your dedication, commitment and sacrifices.
3) What the holy happola is happening to gas prices? I reckon that you're not concerned being that you roll around in that super tank of a caddy. It must be nice to jump in the car for a drive anytime in DC or Crawford and not have to scrounge for a few gallons of gas.
I know you're a busy guy and all flying everywhere with all that gas money but please feel free to give us a ringy-dingy anytime here at the park. Our fondest howdy do's to the little lady and offspring. Oh, and congrats on the new Chaney bundle of joy. I for one have thoroughly enjoyed seeing that Republican nightmare swept under the rug. Go team!
Happy GAY PRIDE month to you and yours!
(Un)Sincerely,
Two Pink Flamingos and a Trailer Park.
posted by Renny at
11:44 PM
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